Hey there! Welcome to Newsletter #9. From now on we’ll be adding in some guest writers from time to time.

To start this off, Jaqueline has volunteered to be our first test subject and has written our main article for this week. She’s a friend of Juan and mine, from when we all worked at HousingAnywhere together, now living in Spain. She’s also been the #1 fan of this newsletter so far, and has participated in the most of our Accountability Groups 😁. Check out her article at the end!

This last week, I emailed one of my recent favorite authors, whom I referenced in Newsletters #5 (How to Live) and #8 (Don’t be a Donkey), telling him that I mentioned him in these. And he wrote such a kind reply back. It definitely made my week.

And Juan is now in the land down under, hugging Koalas, and eating weird meats like Crocadiles and Kangaroos.

HEADING

The Courage to Be Yourself

This last week, I read a book with the eye-catching name of “The Courage to Be Disliked” by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. This book goes through the principles of Adlerian Philosophy. It was full of many profound thoughts and statements, but I’ll share the two from it that I felt were the most thought-provoking.

The Courage to Be Happy
Have you ever found yourself uttering phrases along the lines of: “If only I had this much money, I would be happy”, “If only I could date her, I would be happy”, or “If only my family had accepted me, I would be happy”? The excuses we make stop us from being who we want to be. We make these excuses because we fear having the sole responsibility put in our own hands.
By saying these things, you are giving yourself an excuse to be unhappy and thus allow yourself not to change. In reality, happiness is a choice and a responsibility that lies within us. That doesn’t mean that it is easy. It takes courage to accept that the power to choose our own responses to life’s challenges, and our attitudes to life’s circumstances are in our own hands. What would you change if you believed your happiness was entirely in your control?

The Courage to Be Disliked
We often act and become who we are because we don't want others to dislike us. We do things to appease others, because of our fear of rejection. This compulsion towards people-pleasing and conformity prevents us from embracing our true selves. If we overcome our fears and take responsibility for ourselves, we can face the social pressures that hold us back. There may be those in our lives that disagree with our new actions. But true freedom comes from being liberated from the need for external validation. Taking this step to be true to ourselves and not worry about what others think shows real bravery—it takes courage to be disliked.

“If you’re not living life for yourself, then who is going to live it for you?”
- Ichiro Kishimi

— Michael

WORK

How to Survive Stupidity at Work

There are a lot of people stuck in absolutely moronic bureaucracies.

Flipcharts vs Filipinos
There was a woman who faced a ludicrous debate at work over renaming a "flipchart" due to perceived offense. The concern? The word "flip" might upset Filipinos. Although they would have to vacuum up the whole planet to find the one Filipino who actually cared about this stupidity and did not have bigger problems in their life. This led to an exhaustive 32-email saga to rename a simple office tool—instead of trying to actually have a life and do something useful.

What happens if you follow their stupidity?
1. Mental distortion: You will pretend that you agree with it and over time you eventually will. Good luck to your soul.
2. Loss of motivation: Why should you be slaving away at this job when you know you are being picked to death by morons with stupid rules? You will start resenting them and make you miserable.

So what should you do about this?
Object at the earliest point possible. You will find that if you object to radical stupidity when it first emerges, you make people aware that what they’re doing is radically stupid and they will usually back off.

But what happens if they…?
You have to take a risk. It’s one of those situations where you are dammed if you do and damned if you don’t. Don’t do things you know to be stupid and let them know how stupid it is. If they challenge you, say it will negatively affect your motivation and make you resentful. If they keep pushing you, then it’s time for a different job. If the institution you are in is going in that direction and you can’t stop it, leave.

The Importance of an Exit Strategy
Always have an escape route planned. It should be an active plan because if you don’t have an escape route, you can’t say no. And if you can’t say no, you can’t bargain. And if you can’t bargain, you’re a slave.

“Make something foolproof and the world will build a greater fool.”
- Unknown

Source: Jordan Peterson interview

— Juan

HEALTH

You Are What You Eat

We are all familiar with the saying, "You are what you eat," yet its significance goes way beyond our dietary consumption. 

Getting Physical

Blaming Others
It is so easy to blame our genetics for being predisposed to diseases. While it is true that what we inherit from our parents makes us more prone to having certain conditions, believing that the cards are not in our hands is a very extrinsic way to look at it. 

“Our genetics load the gun but our lifestyle pulls the trigger.”
-  Dr. Caldwell Esselstyn

In the end, our lifestyle “feeds” those predispositions and hence increases or decreases the likelihood of whether the diseases will actually come to life. 

What can prevent the trigger from being pulled?

• eating healthy “duuh”

• moving your body

• keeping your brain active

• which ingredients you consume through your skin and lungs

Getting Mental

Being mindful of our consumption goes as far as our thoughts. Humans have approximately 70,000 thoughts per day (many repetitive). By consuming our thoughts when actively thinking about them, we let them take over our feelings and moods.

It is, for example, normal to be sad when you just went through a breakup, but if after weeks you actively think about everything you believe you have lost, you are the one breaking your heart, not your ex. 

In short: Thinking is the root cause of all suffering. 

If you want to go more in-depth about this topic “Don't Believe Everything You Think” by Joseph Nguyen is a great read.

Lastly, being mindful of the digital content we consume, ensuring it aligns with our values and has a positive contribution to us can shape our mental health and productivity.

So a simple habit such as replacing our energy-draining Monday morning Instagram scroll with the energy-boosting Ambitious Bois Newsletter can already set you up for a productive start into the week.

— Jaq

TAKING ACTION

Sign up to our Accountability Clubs

Want a community to keep you accountable? Willing to put your money where your mouth is? 😂

How it works:
💸 Everyone makes the same deposit at the beginning of the month.
✅ Every day you succeed, you get paid back a small amount from your deposit PLUS the money from others who failed that day.
❌ Every day you fail, your money for that day goes to people who succeed.
🗓️ It is 5 times a week. Month-to-month contract. You can join or leave at the beginning of each month.

March Clubs you can join:
🏋️ Exercise 5 times a week.
⏰ Wake up early during weekdays.
📵 Digital minimalism during weekdays.
📝 Signup to join for March

Updates from this week:

We want to start some new accountability groups! So if you have some ideas for what you’d like to be held accountable for getting done, let us know 😉. Our March groups start tomorrow! So far, for this next month we have 6 people in our exercise group, and 5 people in the wake-up group. The digital minimalism one will probably go on a pause for this month.

Highlights from Exercise Club: